I promised myself that in 2011 I wouldn’t find myself discussing the beef that is Lil Kim and Nicki Minaj because at this point it’s completely fruitless and shows NO sign of a festive lyrical wrestling match. However, with the news emerging that Kim and Mary J. Blige are joining forces to throw dirt at Nicki Minaj and Keyshia Cole last night, I figured I’d step in and say something in the most polite manner possible: KNOCK. THIS. SHIT. THE. FUCK. OFF!

Before I go on, please miss me with the “Lil Kim is a legend and Nicki Minaj is just a rookie” rhetoric because even a blind man can see that- that’s not what this is about. You know when your girlfriend/boyfriend nags you about the same thing..over and over and OVER? Yeah, that’s the lane we’re traveling in with this situation. And to be honest, my gripe isn’t even maneuvering in that direction, it’s the fact that Kim thinks it’ll be a brilliant idea to bring Mary J. Blige and Keyshia Cole into the cattiness.

Said Kim during a NYE function at Club Hippodrome in Springfield, Mass “I think this other bitch got a song with Keyshia Cole, right? Coming at me and the mothafuckin’ other queen, Mary J. Blige. Me and my girl Mary J. Blige about to eat these bitches alive where they won’t even fucking exist no more and erase their fucking social security number! We gon’ remind them who the fuck we are! I’m not playing with this bitch for 2011. I’m saying, we can rock together but bitch you ain’t taking nothing from me!”

Now we’re all familiar with artists jumping the gun and announcing singles, project ideas and such on a premature scale so I’m clutching my hip-hop bible as we speak and praying to the Gods that THIS is exactly THAT. Now I don’t even like Keyshia Cole, never really did except for the fact that her pillows looks EXTREMELY fluffy, so I could careless who’s aiming at her. But it seems like Kim is speaking for both parties on this go round.

Why is it that NO ONE had these thoughts when Keyshia released “I Ain’t Thru” MONTHS ago? Oh that’s right, because sometimes, JUST sometimes people use this thing called COMMON SENSE. Now maybe I’m missing something on “I Aint Thru” but I’ve heard the track a good number of times to know there aren’t any lines aiming at MJB. And like I said before, neither had anyone else.

Matter fact, when has there been any news of a rift between Mary J. Blige and Keyshia Cole? I mean can we really call THIS beef? I think not. I could go on for days and days on how absurd this shit would be if it actually became a reality, but I’d probably be talking myself into a migraine because unless Kim’s on the Billboard Chart at #1, shorty’s mouth is going to continue to run. It’d be wrong if Keyshia Cole smacked the shit out of Kim for pulling a stunt like this. She looks like the type to run up on you, smack first and ask questions last.

What do YOU guys make of all this nonsense?